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Most cats are somewhat jealous about sharing their special toys, food dishes, or attention with other animals, but if your cat’s jealousy extends far beyond these things and begins to border on anxiety and aggressiveness, it is time for you to step in and help him change that behavior

Things that may cause anxious or jealous behavior in your cat

1. Recent changes in the household.

Top on the list of things that may cause anxiety or jealousy in your cat is the addition of a new baby or a new pet to your home. Suddenly, your cat feels threatened, because his claim on territory and attention that was formerly his, alone, seems to be slipping away. He sees the adorable new baby getting the attention that used to belong to him, or the new family dog given a lap to sit in that used to be occupied by the cat. No wonder he is jealous.

2. Moving to a different home.

Another big change in your cat’s life takes place whenever the family moves to a different home or takes a vacation. When you move from one house to another, your cat is suddenly confronted with all of his favorite spots disappearing, and being confronted with strange new spots that may take a while for him to adjust to. If he is left home alone for long periods of time, his bewilderment is compounded.

3. Loss of privileges.

A third, but common cause that may bring anxiety and jealousy to your cat is when, for some reason, he loses privileges that formerly belonged to him. Perhaps his single owner has acquired a spouse and suddenly, the cat is no longer welcome in his owner’s bed, or a cat that has formerly been allowed to use a particular chair as a scratching post finds that the old chair has been replaced by a new one that is off limits—at least for scratching purposes.

When you notice any of the above symptoms in your cat, see if any of the following remedies help.

1. Try to prepare your cat for the addition of new household members ahead of time. For a new baby, use baby lotion on your body so he can become accustomed to the smell. Set up the baby’s crib, diaper pail, and clothes early if possible so that a lot of new things aren’t sprung on the cat all at one time. Secure a tape with baby sounds, including crying on it and play it often so your cat will accept the sounds. The same sound taping idea will work when the new addition is a puppy or a kitten. Set up a new litterbox; line up a new sleeping place, and a few new toys for your expected pet.

When the new baby or pet arrives, take time to introduce him or her to your cat slowly. Supervise them carefully and avoid leaving your cat along with either a new baby or a new pet until you are certain that the relationship is going to be harmonious. Talk to your cat when you are both near the baby or new pet so he will not feel neglected. A few ear scratches and snuggles might be well received, too.

2. When you change homes, it would be great if your cat could visit a few times first, but, if that isn’t possible, be sure to bring all his familiar things along. His litterbox, his favorite toys, and even the battered old scratching post. The idea is to make his new home seem as much like the old home as possible.

Avoid leaving your cat alone in the new home for long periods of time at first. It won’t be long before he discovers some new territory to claim as his own and will begin to feel at home. If you have to be away, maybe you could enlist the help of another family member to cat sit for a few hours a day for a few days.

3. A child who has lost former privileges feels resentment. He may act up in unexpected ways to get even with whomever he blames for his predicament. For example, if a new spouse arrives in the house at the same time the cat is banned from his owner’s bed, of course he will decide the newcomer is responsible. And, his reaction may not be nice.

Some cats respond by ignoring the newcomer. Others hiss or even bite. Some are sneaky and try to get even by using the intruder’s shoe as a temporary litterbox, or by shredding something the newcomer owns.

If you notice anything like this starting to happen, have the person against whom the cat is directing his aggression take over feeding chores, talking soothingly to the cat as he fills his food and water bowls. Let the cat get his treats for a while from his imagined enemy, and provide lots of opportunities for the cat to be alone in the house with this person. Use catnip here and there to attract the cat to the person he is trying to avoid.

If you are determined and persistent, it won’t be long before even the most stubborn cat will be dividing his affections equally between both of his owners.

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